Week 3/Day 17 ~ 21 days to a Positive Attitude (Tuesday March 18)

Day 17 - Tuesday

1) Every day write down 3 good things that happened that day for which you are grateful.

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A. Starbucks.  Anne, my wife, brought me Starbucks.

B. Caught the 24 hour stomach bug from my daughter yesterday.  Even with that illness, I had enough energy to do my PT for the day.

C. Anne bought my daughter, whose house I am staying at during Physical Therapy rehabilitation, Frozen.

2) Journal about one positive blessing. One of the three, and explain why that good thing is better than the bad things that happened.

Today I want to talk about the little blessings that are really the larger blessings.  This is the time period in this rehabilitation where I am caught between not being healed enough to function in my world, even at a reduced level, and not damaged enough that every day would bring gain.  For example, there is hope tangible when you can measure the improvement at each Physical Therapy session. Yet, I am at the stage of improvement now where I will not see daily gain anymore but I am not well enough to attend class.  It is depressing.  Add that to my wife reaching the limit of her ability to endure making all the decisions without much or any help from me.  Finally, add to that my TBI making every little thing into a major end of the world crisis.  For example, I came down stairs and it suddenly hit me that when I was damaged (this very same knee over 20 years ago and the injury that cause the need for the knee replacement this time) and convalescing the last time, the church I attend visited me once a week, even the week that was a partial week.  I started eating lunch with the pastor on that 3rd week as I recall.  That started me down the road to knowing Jesus.  I attended that church because that is what my family did.  I do not know if I actually knew the Lord or not, because of my brain injury.  I only know that the pastor figured out that I was analytical, and needed more that doctrine and rhetoric to follow.  So he introduced me to his library that he started at seminary, and the library that the church also maintained, and guided my study so that I came to understand the seminarian side of faith.  All that came from pastoral visits because I attended his church and was a member of his flock. From that, I eventually became a member of  vestry and the superintendent of Sunday Schools for the Church. Then he retired, and we switched churches, to attend a church that preached the gospel of Jesus and the Holy Bible.  

With all that in mind, I noticed out loud, to my wife, that no one from our current church had visited me at all.  In fact, the pastor I had told about my surgery was surprised that I had it the first week I showed up at church.  Now I get it.  I have no position at the church, and the church is 1000's of people big.  I am not starving or dying and I am coming every Sunday no matter what, so it's not like I am a high priority, and other's need their pastoral staff far more than I.  But TBI doesn't work that way.  It is selfish.  So suddenly I am overwhelmed with depression because my church has not sent a pastor, a card, and email or a facebook note.  Kids have from both the Sunday School I am no longer allowed to teach at and from my Karate School, and a family of Christians have (see Day 16), but no one from the church I now attend had even registered that I was injured, much less injured with TBI or in need of help spiritual with my family.  It crushed me.  I mentioned it too my wife, and she, being the practical person she is, immediately brought to bear all of what I just mentioned about the reasons I should not need a visit. The problem is, logic does not work with TBI. 

So, out of all this make believe and real pain, how does a blessing arrive.  Starbucks.  Anne brought me Starbucks.  It took 6 hours to register, but the the little blessings sometimes are the best. Starbucks from my wife is proof that God is alive in my wife and my life. Duh.

3) Meditate and detach from multi-tasking, by focusing on scripture~ read it, research it, think about how it might impact your life.

John 13:10 (CEV)  Jesus answered, “People who have bathed and are clean all over need to wash just their feet. And you, my disciples, are clean, except for one of you.” 

If you are a literalistic, then you might actually wash people's feet at church or, as I have seen at least once, at your home.  I, however, have become amazed at the way Jesus taught by analogy.  Nearly everything he says is a mystery wrapped in an enigma, wrapped in a secret as Winston Churchill said about Russia in the second world war. He even explained why he taught that way, and I had missed it.  So, when I read a statement that has no current context, I try to place it in context of the time it was said and then try to see if it really is talking about the spiritual world and its reflection in the physical world.

So, on reflection, I believe that Jesus is telling me that if we are his, already of the kingdom, then we do not have to continually repeat the process of entering the kingdom, for we have already been made clean.  Yet, he warns, we walk in the world, and as we make contact with the world, we become unclean, and must confess that sin, or uncleanliness, every day. Further, me must do so with our brothers and sisters.

But this one confuses me, so I will revisit it again.

4) One random act of kindness a week. You can do more. (Try one a day)

none today
5) Pray. Lay down the hurtful things and gather strength. 

Done

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Rules for 21 Days to a Positive Attitude Click here

Day 2: Click Here.  Day 3: Click Here.  Day 4: Click Here.
Day 5: Click Here.  Day 6: Click Here.  Day 7: Click Here.
Day 8: Click Here.  Day 9: Click Here.  Day 10: Click Here.
Day11: Click Here. Day12: Click Here. Day13: Click Here.
Day14: Click Here. Day15: Click Here. Day16: Click Here.